A Love Letter to the Over-Givers
I was reading C.S. Lewis recently, and this line stopped me in my tracks:
“True humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less.”
For my sweet over-givers, my people-pleasers, my hearts that bend and stretch for everyone but themselves—this one is for you.
I know how easy it is to confuse humility with self-sacrifice. To believe that love is measured by how much you give, how often you say yes, how willing you are to set yourself aside for the comfort of others.
And yet, time and time again, you find yourself depleted, wondering where you went in the process.
Humility was never meant to be a loss of self.
It was never meant to be an erasure of your needs, your desires, your boundaries. It is not about making yourself smaller so others feel bigger. It is not about dimming your light so others can shine.
True humility—the kind that expands you rather than drains you—is rooted in love. And love, real love, requires you to be whole.
So, I want you to ask yourself:
Am I giving from a full cup or from obligation?
Do I honor myself the way I honor others?
Do I know the difference between kindness and self-abandonment?
I want to remind you that it is not selfish to tend to your own soul. It is not selfish to say no, to rest, to protect your peace. It is not selfish to think of yourself—not in a way that places you above others, but in a way that acknowledges your worth as equal to theirs.
Imagine what would happen if you turned some of that love inward. If the compassion you so freely offer became something you also gave to yourself. If your heart became a home that you, too, were allowed to live in.
This is your invitation to step into a new kind of humility.
One that lets you be generous without self-sacrifice. One that lets you give without losing yourself. One that allows you to love from a place of wholeness, not depletion.
Here are some resources to help support you:
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You are not here to be a martyr. You are here to be a vessel of love—one that includes yourself.